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Mental Health

Having to do with my mental health journey, or what I have learned about mental health.

I Wouldn’t Change It

Now that you’ve got a clearer picture, hopefully, of what autism looks like in my life and the mechanisms involved, I want to explain a bit about why I, personally, would not want my autism “cured,” were I offered the choice. Maybe you think that it sounds awful. Being frequently assaulted by unfriendly sensory stimuli, not understanding the unspoken social rules, feeling distress at small changes that you feel you really shouldn’t mind, losing communities because you just can’t let go of things that no… Read More »I Wouldn’t Change It

Monotropism, the DEP, and the Neurodiversity Paradigm

In my post about my autism diagnosis, I mentioned Monotropism, a theory of autism from the minds of autistic scientists. I’d like to come back to it, because I really think it’s the best way to explain autistic traits. For a brief introduction to the ideas behind this theory, you can visit its home on the web. Please take a moment to check out the homepage as well as the Explanations page – there’s a short video there that gives you the basics, which is very… Read More »Monotropism, the DEP, and the Neurodiversity Paradigm

Masking

Maybe you’re wondering how I got to this age without being diagnosed. After all, I’ve been seeing psychologists and psychiatrists since I was in high school. Surely someone should have noticed? There are several parts to the answer. One is simply that most people, even your average psychologist, don’t actually specialize in autism, and wouldn’t know what to look for. I mean, we had a lecture about it in one of my university classes, and I certainly didn’t have a clue what it really looked like. Another… Read More »Masking

Special Interests

Note: I’ve elected to start with discussing some aspects of the criteria for diagnosis in the DSM-5, out of convenience, before branching out to less medicalized/deficit-based facets of the conversation. Please don’t take this to mean that I think the DSM criteria are the most accurate or complete explanation of the autistic experience, nor is this a complete discussion of those criteria. — I really like Sailor Moon. I’ve watched every episode (and the movies) of the original anime multiple times, as well as all of Sailor… Read More »Special Interests

Sameness and Routines

Note: I’ve elected to start with discussing some aspects of the criteria for diagnosis in the DSM-5, out of convenience, before branching out to less medicalized/deficit-based facets of the conversation. Please don’t take this to mean that I think the DSM criteria are the most accurate or complete explanation of the autistic experience, nor is this a complete discussion of those criteria. — I’m not a particularly tidy person,1 but it distresses me in a way I can’t quite explain when things end up in the… Read More »Sameness and Routines

Autism in My Life

I’ve spent a lot of the last three years learning about autism and figuring out what it might represent in my lived experience. When I started telling people about my diagnosis, I learned pretty quickly that most people don’t have years of learning and reflection to pull from in understanding this. In fact, most people have a pretty shaky grasp on what autism is at all. I certainly did, prior to 2023. So, I decided to put together a series of blog posts covering some of what… Read More »Autism in My Life

Autism Awareness/Acceptance Month

Just in time for Autism Awareness (or Acceptance) Month (April), I got to celebrate my autistic awareness (or acceptance) with my very own official diagnosis. This has been a long time coming. I started looking into the possibility that I might be autistic at the beginning of 2023. It’s the main reason that my blog posts since then have been much sparser than they were in 2022. It was hard to find the motivation to write about my mental health when I couldn’t be as… Read More »Autism Awareness/Acceptance Month

The Ups and Downs of Knowing Your Limits

2026 NOTE: My diagnostic situation has changed since I wrote this. See this post and the series of posts starting here for more information. It’s been months since my last post. I haven’t really felt like I have anything to say, or if I do, it’s in the form of a song or a story. And I promise, there’s movement on the album and the novel. But recently I realized I did have something I wanted to say, and it wasn’t going to fit neatly… Read More »The Ups and Downs of Knowing Your Limits

Out of My Depth

2026 NOTE: My diagnostic situation has changed since I wrote this. See this post and the series of posts starting here for more information. Imagine this. For the sake of argument, you are not a very strong swimmer. But you do like to be in the water, so you get yourself an ENORMOUS flutter board and you take it out to the lake or the pool and you flutter your way out of the shallows. Then you stand on your enormous flutter board. And it’s… Read More »Out of My Depth

Quiet

2026 NOTE: My diagnostic situation has changed since I wrote this. See this post and the series of posts starting here for more information. I wouldn’t want to lose a number of the things I own. My wedding and engagement rings, obviously. My signed edition of Terry Pratchett’s The Wee Free Men. Certain pieces of clothing or jewelry. But one of those things that a lot of people might not guess holds such importance is a pair of headphones. A pair of comfortable, Bluetooth-capable, noise-cancelling headphones. Typing. Chewing.… Read More »Quiet